I cry sometimes.

I got a phone call from my dad yesterday. He was concerned because of the three days I spent with him, about 6hours were spent weeping somewhat uncontrollably. You see, I tend to cry a lot. Today, I cried while worshipping in my livingroom. I don't usually cry when people expect me to cry. For some reason I can take the death of a loved one or dear friend and not a tear comes....until later on, when I am alone, or a certain lyric of a certain song brings the memory of that person vividly to my being. Then I cry.
Other times, it would seem that tears come pretty randomly. My friends and comrades in the War College will remember many times where I burst into tears in the middle of recreate, or knee drill, or simply walking down the street. My mom could tell you of times when I would shut myself up in my room and cry for an hour or so. I can remember many times in Army meetings, when I would be weeping through the entire service, but would be glued to my seat, smearing the tears and the snot into my sleeve, or letting them drop to the floor so that no one would know I was crying. Then I would get up, rush to the bathroom, splash water on my face, and come out telling everyone how fine I was, and go home for lunch.
I don't know where the idea came into my head that it was unacceptable to cry in church, or with friends. When did we decide it was better to keep our hurt feelings knotted up inside of us, only to let them loose on some punching bag, or by driving fast, or drowning them in alchohol or drugs than to cry with someone and talk it out. Have we become such an untrustworthy people that we cannot trust our friends with our tears?
Maybe there is something to be learned from the Jews with their wailing wall, or from children who can show their emotions so easily and unashamedly. As soon as they start crying for whatever reason are swept into the arms of someone who loves them and are comforted. Why are we so slow to comfort those who are weeping and crying out as adults? Is it that their pain might possibly dredge up some painful memories in ourselves that we might have to share with them? Or when we are the ones crying, why do we skulk off into the shadows as if feeling real emotion were s